I still have my feet on the ground, I just wear better shoes. (Oprah, yes, really)
I have a GRAVE and EXTREMELY serious topic this schaiße weather Monday. This is something I do NOT eff around with: FEET.
Yes, readers, I know that the summer is pretty much officially over for most of you, however I want to engrave this topic into all your pretty heads, and have you spread the word, so that, when next summer comes, I do not have to witness such disgusting atrocity as summer past. Ugly calloused, yellowed cracked heels, piles of old skin, chipped polish, overly long toe nails…. Need I go on? Please don’t make me as I am getting gaggy already. I hate other people’s feet, I really do. Heck, I have made a career out of covering them up, that is how much I do not wish for them to see the light of day.
My very wise friend C once announced that she thinks pedicures should be mandatory like dental checkups, and I couldn’t agree more. Leaving that much dead skin on any part of your body can’t be good for you… we are looking at foot fungus, infected blisters, in grown toenails, and the yellowed cracking….? Uuughghghghghghg. While no one expects you to run to the foot spa every other week (I do get monthly pedis, and my foot hygiene is impeccable based on the previously mentioned foot hatred… I can only stand mine if they are in gorgeus shape), but a self pedicure every month is highly encouraged, and a professional one should be done AT THE VERY LEAST at the start of sandal season and at the end.
If you do not have the time or desire to make a whole ritual of it, it would not hurt to pumice those heels every other day at the end of your shower, when the dead skin cells have loosened up. It is kind of like flossing, just do a bit every day to avoid major disasters later on. I would invest in a decent foot cream and moisturize those babies in the evening before you go to bed. Just these two small contributions will make you look a million times better. Really. As for the toes, try to avoid aggressive polishes (or only keep them on for a week max), this is to ensure that you do not end up with chipped old looking crimson toes. It makes you look sloppy, no matter if you read in Nylon that chipped polish is in… sloppiness is NEVER in. (One should not listen to advice from Peaches Geldof)
Finally, once again, make sure your shoes fit well. The better the fit, the less likely your feet will get damaged. PLEASE MAKE SURE, and this applies to a lot of seemingly attractive women, that your sandals are not too small for you. When your toes hang over the front of your platforms making your feet look like claws, you need bigger shoes, you look ridiculous, and I don’t care if they are Dolce and you got them at 50% off.
Boys, your feet are also important. Get a pedi once in a while. They feel nice and will make your football shoes hurt less. I have several very manly friends who I have talked into pedicures and they absolutely loved them. I mean, foot massage by young pretty girl? Hello!!!
I keep my feet in great shape year round, because you never know when you might be trying on stilettos, summer OR winter. And you want to do it without shame. Additionally, pretty feet makes boys want to buy me shoes, it’s a win win for all parties involved.
Now, go!!!
