great Firewall of China
hi Kittens! Just letting you know that I am about to enter the great firewall of China and will not be able to post for the next few weeks. I am not forgetting about you, I just can’t access Tumblr. <3 M.H. Keep on Hussyin’
On Getting Jiggy
Everybody likes sex. Hell, a great part of human interaction lies in trying to score. We go out looking for sex, and when we find someone who we like to bang repeatedly ( and who makes us happy ) we try to keep them around. In a relationship sex is a key element that determines the lifespan of a couple. If you listen to Dan Savage as much as I do, you know that the problem that comes up over...
You’re a grown up now. You have a job, you join professional circles and attend happy hour events. You take business class when travelling. These are all great. And it is fantastic that you can interact with your coworkers (and climb that corporate ladder like the corporate whore you are) in a social setting. But you need to remember one key thing. No matter how well you get along with your...
I was doing some trend research for work. What better way than to ask the facebook? This particular question had to deal with the kind of music that people in their late teens and early 20s listen to. The responses I received were a slew of snarky comments by thirty something year olds, letting me know that I should stop hitting on jail bait, asking me if I am not too old to listen to Justin...
On Fetishes: Mr. Foot
I haven’t posted in a couple of weeks, because life kind of got in the way (too busy with work during the week and too hungover on the weekends, I totally suck.) Anyhow to make it up to you, I have a very special treat. I almost never post entries by other people (this is MY BLOG), but my dear friend Lusty Lady Cycle has agreed to share with you this excellent (and true) story about her...
On Fast Forward Relationships
You know when you date a sea of asshole weirdos and then meet someone who makes you laugh and gets you and is ridiculously attractive and nice and smart and LIKES YOU BACK all the same ways? You spend the first three weeks of knowing one another together non-stop. Dates turn into three day sleepovers, you get more jiggy than you have all last year, you spend hours gazing at one another while The...
due to some emotional terrorism, Easto parent guilt, much required yoga classes and a looming deadline this week’s post will be a little bit late. It is in progress and it is a good one love MH
On aging partiers (and how I blame the internet...
Remember when we were in our late teens and early twenties and everytime we went out there was the one creepy dude who would hang at the end of the bar and perv at all the young girls? Gross. That dude was at least 31. Having attended an indie show the other day, I looked around and realized just how much the cross section of partiers has changed. It seems that these days if you still hang out in...
If I am ever busy I will just post links to this blog she’s good!
On Horrible Tattoos
Some time ago I posted an entry about getting a tattoo here. I have to do a follow up after my beach vacation on the worst tattoos I have seen: 1. Again several unicorn heads. On women over 40. Worst 2. Dolphins. Also on women over 40. What’s up with older broads and bad tattoo choices? And please remember my rule- if you meet someone with a dolphin tattoo,don’t bang them...
On Chivalry (just in time for Valentine’s day)
If you live in certain parts of North America you likely got hit by some spectacular winter weather last week. The Modern Hussy LOOOOOVES snow. I love the cold, I love wearing furry things and leather things, and I love winter sports. Most importantly I love how the city looks, covered with a soft layer of white, fluffy snow. What I do not like, is driving in the snow. And last Friday I had to...
On Banging in the City
All right single girl, you’re doing it. You successfully got over your ex, are over your fear of new penises and are starting to date. You quickly realize just how sucky you are at this. Don’t worry. No one is a natural and these things improve over time (and over more dates). In all likelihood you will meet someone who already frequents your circles. Even the biggest city is...
this blog IS super offensive and has never claimed otherwise the PC term for a person with disabilities is ‘person with developmental disabilities’ and I would never call such a person ‘retarded’
On how Retarded Girls Are (part time lovers,...
When I think back to two years ago I realize even more now how retarded I was as a single girl looking for love. Now I AM in love, and my love is super fab, and nice and fun and nice and makes me happy. With that said, don’t think that I am an asshole who now only talks about her relationship and doesn’t understand single people. I do understand and I am very sympathetic, it’s brutal...
On Internet Dating
If you have been reading this blog since the beginning you know that I swore Internet dating off after my one and only date- read about it here. However I still think that for some this is an excellent way of meeting new people and falling in lust. You might say that I have no experience with these matters, but actually I have talked many of my Internet dating friends off the ledge after a...
On Introducing the Person You have been Dating to...
While looking for the next love of your life you will likely date several randoms: the cute boy from the video store, that guy you picked up at the bar while incredibly intoxicated, the guy you stalked on instagram since forever, the barista from the cool café, etc. these are all good and a learning experience. The more people you date the better you will know what you do and do not want from a...
On mass extinction
I have very recently come back from a beach vacation. Although I am usually a more ‘off the beaten path’ traveller, this time my lover and I decided to do something easy and cheap- the all inclusive resort. Pretty much as soon as we got there we realized that going to an all inclusive resort was prooooobably a mistake for the likes of us (creative childless couple in our early ish...
‘Taste’ has been a recent buzzword in my life. As in ”She (or he) has really good taste. “ I have been thinking about this a lot, because frankly I often disagree with the statement being stated about certain people. This has lead me to start analyzing what is taste. Some people will swear that the big fashion houses are what dictates taste. Bloggers will define good...
I know, I know I have been a bad little blogger, abandoning you guys with no advice and no hatred for weeks now. I am sorry. Really and truly. First i was behind the great firewall of China, working so much that only 5 hours of sleep were a treat in between work sessions, and then to counteract that, i left for the beach for a week. The good news is, I have three posts in the works for you...
On Being Back in the Game
You’ve been in back to back relationships since you were 16, and suddenly at twenty something find yourself single, and (un)ready to face the dating world. (Let’s assume the initial three month mourning period of renting 4 horror films from the 90s and falling asleep hugging the cats is over, and you have truly decided to dive head first into ‘the game’). Sista!...
Recently some asshole stole my phone. I felt like I lost a loved pet and felt sad at the thought of my photos from the last two years disappearing into nothingness (I’m bad with backups… ) . It was a very emotional time for me, one that left me sad and defeated, and also violated. People are assholes, and I feel like there is little decency left in the world. After a couple of days...
Hey guys I had a post read to go and then some asshole at a party stole my phone last night- the post was on it. :( i’m going to have to rewrite it. Sorry for the delay, readers! Luv. M.H.
Everyone should date a jerk. It’s true. At some point of your life you should definitely go out with the player, the asshole, the loser, or the thug who breaks your heart. This is a great activity to pursue in your dating life as it teaches you about relationships, teaches you what you do not want in a relationship and - when you find the ultimate sweetheart- makes you appreciate him or her...
I’m not gonna lie here. I totally slacked on this week’s post. I did. I’m horrible. And extremely nerdy. I actually do not have a post this week because I am totally and completely enthralled by reading ‘Game of Thrones’ and it’s eating up all my free time. Sooooooo ya… Note that I have some amazing posts lined up for you for next week! Stay tuned
On partying like you're 20 but suffering like...
So you’re thirty something with few responsibilities. No mortgage, minimal rent, no kids. You have recently realized that all your friends are getting preggers and getting broke due to quasi million dollar mortgages. What do you do? Get younger friends, naturally. You feel younger than you are and you still wanna party. Your lack of responsibilities paired with a higher income than when...
On living up to expectations
How many girls have eating disorders caused by impossible to achieve model bodies? How many actresses have amazing huge perky boobs and the perfect hourglass figure that dudes covet? Gah, is one supposed to be happy with herself when all around there are women inspirations so gorgeus and so impossible that no one could ever love dowdy mousy us? How are we supposed to live up to models and porn...
On Taking those Blinders Off
Why is it that when we are in love with someone they are glorious and amazing, but after breaking up w them we see their faults. So suddenly, —-Artsy indie guy with underground event connections - becomes Jehovah’s witness coke head who wore purple skinny jeans, and probably liked dudes more than girls. -Travelling film maker party guy turns to Fake Buddhist with a dolphin tattoo...
On the Gym of Life Add On
last point which I forgot (and remembered this weekend while doing chores) *CLEAN YOUR HOUSE. I am not sure when you scrubbed your floors the last time, but it is hard work. For some great arm toning get the mop and rags and get to work. Clean floors + work out? Amazing.
On the Gym of Life
Once upon a time I was an avid gym goer. I got up at the crack of dawn on Saturdays to run, spent late hours punching, kicking and lifting weights. I was at the gym 4-5 days a week. I went through periods of counting calories, eliminating starchy foods and living on vegetable juice. Constantly struggling with my weight I kept tight control on everything that went into my mouth (snicker). Then, my...
On Dressing Your Age
This week’s post comes to us via a question from my dear friend TLD. She writes: You know what i’ve been wondering lately, Hussy? should i be dressing differently now that i’m 30? i think about it in my jean cutoffs and ppl are condescending to me cuz they think i’m 20… This is a very valid question, made even more valid by the fact that TLD looks much younger than...
On Dressing for Curves
Skinny chicks have it easy, right?. They are kind of like a coat rack and can get away with throwing on a long t shirt and wearing it as a dress while looking totally fabulous. This is why I really admire girls with curves who know how to pull themselves together in a sexy yet tasteful manner. Today’s post is for one of my awesome readers who asked how to successfully dress for curves....
on Assholes who String you Along
here is a reblog for all those who need it
On Going to Outdoor Music Festivals
I know that summer is almost over but I think this needs to be said. Recently, I had the pleasure of attending a music festival. You know, overpriced bud beer, jail bait in bikinis drunk for the very first time, disgusting toilet situation, an overpacked outdoor venue that wasn’t meant to be a place for a concert. It’s a drag, but it’s also a way to see 12 of your favorite...
On Dating Easto Girls
Boys, are you interested in girls from the eastern part of the world? Do you love curvy bums, great cheekbones, a woman who knows how to cook, one who dresses like a woman, and is just mildly crazy but makes up for it at sexytimes? Well, then I have a life saving guide for you. It is hard for Eastos and non Eastos to date because they are so different. Eastos dating other Eastos is easy as many...
On This Year
Most people use December and January as a way to analyze their hits and misses of the year, but I prefer back to school. Summer ends and you go back to working regular hours and wearing pants even if you (like I) are years post graduation. What better time, as you kiss goodbye lazy park chill outs and calling in sick after that awesome birthday party you went to, and start making resolutions...
On Keeping Her Happy (AKA One for the Boys)
So you got the girl. You’re in a serious monogamous relationship or perhaps even LIVE together. Oooooer. So now you can relax and unbutton the top of your pants, right? WRONG! Dudes, I am here to tell you just how to keep your woman happy even after you have successfully settled down. Likely, there are various misconceptions about what a lady needs from you and many of you likely write it...
@ModernHussy: Even hussies need a vacation! No post this week. I’ll have one next week unless I get eaten by a bear! Bye interwebs!
On Dressing for Work during a Heat Wave
My favorite weather is here! Steamy hot over thirty degrees sweat all the time sunshine and shorty shorts weather. However, instead of waking up at noon followed by coffee followed by tanning on the terasse followed by luring boys into late night whiskey activities as per last summer, this year I get to wake up too early to think and make the depressing trek to the office. People-judging on my...
On Topics to Avoid on a First Date
You just broke up with your boyfriend of 7 (8, 9, 11, 4, 2, whatever) years. You think you are ready to get into the love scene, but seeing how you have not been on a real first date in ages, you probably need some help. We (your friends) want you to do well, we really do. While we do really love your quirky self deprecating humour, and love you with all your faults, weirdness and insecurities...